I bought a new book yesterday: God's Furious Longing by Brennan Manning. I've read excerpts of his work before, and the book caught the attention of Amy & Steebo also. So naturally I bought it. I'm really interested in a lot of things I've been reading about pursuing the Lord in our relationship and not just half-assing it like I do so many other things. It's strange to me that so many people know who the Lord is and aren't completely enthralled by Him or want to know more about Him. It's strange that I was definitely like that just a few years ago. To love the Lord isn't just to have a working knowledge of Him. It must be so much more than I understand.
I've been feeling anxious lately. I can't explain it. Maybe I'm being attacked, or just not intentional enough in bringing my thoughts and decisions to Him before I carry them out, or a combination of both. I'm anxious about Dan's last semester. I'm nervous about Kellie's house search and if I actually want to go in with her on it anymore. I'm afraid to be alone and that there are criminals everywhere (there are.. it is Macon after all). I'm worried that I'm not careful enough with my money, or even if I am that I won't have enough working for this non-profit.
Maybe I should focus on what I'm not worried about. That list I just typed out has been driving me crazy.
I'm NOT worried about
... YoungLife (though I AM praying and working hard for that mission)
... my health
... Dan finding a great job (again.. I am still praying hard)
... the economy (we'll make it)
What I need is a good clear shout from the Lord. Something to make me feel better or more sure of myself.